The Union Club of Cleveland’s Lawrence McFadden, CMC, GM/COO, offers a gentle reminder to managers and chefs that communication matters most when you least expect it to.
The COVID-19 pandemic reminded me of an interaction I had on my bike a few years ago.
As I approached a fellow biker on an afternoon ride, I passed on her left. I then settled in a few yards ahead. She rode up to me, glanced in my direction, and shouted something I couldn’t understand.
To my credit, the Counting Crows were blaring in my ears. She then waved her hand for attention. I paused the song Mrs. Jones to hear her say, “Usually people call out ‘On your right!’ or at least carry a bell.”
I always felt I portrayed the experienced cyclist from the movie Black Rain. I’m aware that our sport is misunderstood and often disliked by commuters in motor vehicles. I was not aware that I could be disliked by a fellow cyclist.
Not since touching another cycle’s wheel years ago in my first Peloton had I gotten such a stern speech on cycling decorum. That dialogue was well deserved when I crashed one of the best riders in the group during a tumble in front of the pack.
When I finally heard this woman’s statement, I looked at her with a blank stare of disbelief and then followed it up with a cold narrow look.
She quickly said, “You aren’t in a good mood today.”
“How far are you riding,” I asked.
“One hour,” she replied. (Cyclists usually talk in hours, not miles, since we all cadence at different levels.)
“How long are you riding,” she asked.
“Four hours,” I said.
“You’re lucky,” she replied.
I picked up the pace and moved further ahead as she wished me a great ride.
For the next two hours, I pondered this interaction and reflected on both of our responses.
Bike riding is painful, frustrating and at time respectful all in one long swallow of dedication. While you feel satisfied at the end, during the ride your mind is twisted with anger, stress, fear, and misery brought on by outside forces.
I have to frequently remind myself not to get upset when disrespected by cars as I fight for just one sliver of the shared road.
So, what caused her to push up her cadence and catch up to my wheel? And then, to front face the situation with a cyclist rule book? Had she just been buzzed or yelled at previously? Was I her last straw?
Maybe I scared her. Maybe I broke her peaceful ride and brought anger to her athletic ballet. Or maybe her exposed hands had enough in the cold fall weather and my actions were the result of an emotional outburst. I certainly knew that feeling. A simple numb foot can push you off the cliff of frustration.
Why, when Stephen Covey, author of The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, says “seek to understand” so damn hard to practice? Why do our paradigms or insecurities manifest themselves in some of the simplest interactions? She certainly wasn’t placing me in harm’s way. It simply a gentle reminder that announcing my approach is a thoughtful action. And thoughtful actions could be what most of my members mean when they voice a comment or concern at their club.